IELTS GENERAL WRITING TASK 2 For 8 bands : Agree Or Disagree Essay
Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodworking should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family. To that extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, mere proficiency in the academic curriculum offered by schools is no longer sufficient. While passing exams is essential, it is equally crucial to acquire practical skills such as dress designing, cooking, plumbing, and more. Some argue that schools should exclusively focus on academic subjects, leaving the teaching of life skills to parents. I, however, hold a contrary opinion and will elaborate on supporting points in this essay.
Firstly, skills like cooking, woodworking, and repair work, often dismissed as leisure activities, are integral to holistic development. They should be an integral part of the school curriculum rather than relying solely on parents for instruction. Employing skilled professionals within schools ensures that children receive comprehensive and accurate training. Moreover, not all parents possess the time or teaching expertise to impart skills that involve potentially hazardous tools.
Secondly, assuming every student’s interest aligns with a rigid academic syllabus is unrealistic. By incorporating life skills into the curriculum from an early stage, schools allow students to discover their passions. A friend of mine, for instance, displayed a talent for sketching at a young age, eventually developing expertise in designing dresses and costumes. His skills were recognized by a prestigious clothing brand, leading to a valuable internship opportunity. If schools integrate such skill-based subjects, numerous students could similarly benefit.
In contrast, some parents contend that schools should focus exclusively on subjects relevant to future careers like engineering or medicine. They fear that introducing skill-based subjects might divert students’ attention, hindering academic performance.
To conclude, education should extend beyond traditional subject areas, incorporating life skills essential for real-world scenarios. Not all students aspire to pursue white-collar professions; some thrive in skill-based businesses. Therefore, a comprehensive educational approach that includes both academic and practical skills is crucial for preparing students for the diverse challenges of adulthood.
Your essay effectively discusses the importance of incorporating practical life skills into the school curriculum alongside academic subjects. Here’s an evaluation based on various factors:
- Task Response (TR): Your essay addresses the task prompt by presenting a clear argument in favor of including practical life skills in the school curriculum. You provide supporting points and counterarguments, demonstrating a balanced approach to the topic.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Your essay is well-organized with clear paragraphs for each main idea. The ideas flow logically, and transitions between paragraphs are smooth. However, consider using more varied sentence structures and cohesive devices to enhance coherence further.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Your vocabulary is varied and appropriate for the topic. You effectively use terms related to education, skills, and career paths. Consider incorporating more advanced vocabulary and idiomatic expressions to further enrich your lexical range.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Your grammar is generally accurate, but there are some minor errors and awkward phrasings throughout the essay. For example, “Assuming every student’s interest aligns with a rigid academic syllabus is unrealistic” could be revised for clarity. Proofreading for these errors and ensuring sentence structures are more varied could improve your GRA score.
Based on the IELTS criteria, I would assign the following bands for each criterion:
- Task Response (TR): Band 7
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Band 7
- Lexical Resource (LR): Band 7
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Band 6.5
Overall, your essay effectively argues for the inclusion of practical life skills in the school curriculum. With some improvements in grammar and vocabulary usage, you could enhance your score further. Keep practicing, and you’ll do great!